Take Back Your Life!


From victim to survivor to thriver you don't have to do it alone. A positive manual for survivors about healing from abuse and the lessons learned along the way.

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« I've been interviewed!Non-Violence: a guest post by Ron Rink »

If it isn't fixed yet, break it!

02/04/09

Permalink 11:00:00 am, by Ayngel Email , 320 words, 2150 views   English (US)
Categories: Self-Help

If it isn't fixed yet, break it!

We hear people say “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it,” all the time. But there are times in life when it is broken, what then?

If your child gets in serious trouble every time you leave them alone, are you still leaving them alone?

If your lover keeps cheating on you, do you keep forgiving them?

If someone always borrows money and never pays it back, are you still giving them money?

If there is someone that gets on your nerves every time you are around them, are you still hanging out with them?

Follow up:

We all have the freedom in life to choose our course of action, but when we do choose we are still responsible for that choice.

We as humans do tend to do the same things over and over expecting different results. If we keep leaving our child alone, he will keep getting into serious trouble, our lover will keep cheating, our friend will keep borrowing. I keep saying that life is full of cycles, and one of the keys to happiness is learning how to break those cycles.

In this case, recognizing patterns in your life that aren’t working and finding changes you can make. You could hire your child a babysitter, you could insist that they go with you everywhere you go, you can explore your options. There are always options, you just haven't thought of some of them yet.

When you find yourself frustrated over a situation in your life, any situation stop and examine it a little more closely. Are you trying to change the other person, or are you trying to change yourself. Changing another person is futile, the only person you have the power to change is you.

Stop the power struggle, and take a close look at your methods. What changes can you make, what approaches haven’t you tried, where can you go from here?



1 comment

As the author of the book points out, humans tend to keep trying the same things over and over and hoping for different results. Then we can't figure out why we are so frustrated. If you have a frustrating situation in your life, examine it closely and see if there are some changes you can make.

Often times we are trying to control another person and this is always bound for failure, control yourself and your perceptions and see what you can change to end that frustration.
03/16/09 @ 01:24

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